I’m being a bad book blogger, so F it, I’m blogging about MOI today.
Yesterday was HORRID, not the WORST EVER, but pretty gosh darn bad. Here’s the dilio:
- If you are squeamish, skip this one – At 8:10am yesterday after being awake for approximately 50 minutes I drove to work and hit a squirrel. In 10 years of driving I have never hit any type of animal. I was traumatized. I saw it’s tail out of the corner of my eye on one side of the car, drew in a deep breath as I couldn’t avoid the inevitable, tightened my hands on the steering wheel, screamed, then FELT AND HEARD it’s little skull hit my undercarriage, little crunches of bones, and then saw it fly out the other side of my car. Then I called hubby and cried. Later in the day I called him and cried again and told him we needed to adopt another dog to make up for my murderous ways. I am totally traumatized.
- I tried to break off a piece of some peanut brittle out of the shared fridge and bent my fingernail so far back it showed the flesh underneath and swelled up and bled under the nail and it’s all purple.
- I think my office is giving me Sick Building Syndrome (my hypochondriac friend told me about that gem) but really I’m sure many desk-jockey/cubicle monkeys feel the same way – after hours of sitting in overly filtered, too cold air, staring at a computer screen, and sitting still I get a headache and feel woozy. SO ANYWAY I took a break to walk around the block and get some fresh air. It was cloudy and looked like it might rain, and a big fat drop landed on my arm. While looking up at the sky I rubbed it away, but it felt slimy. I looked down and found a GIANT BIRD POOP smeared all over my hand and arm. FML.
- This weekend in Chicago I gained back the 5lbs I just lost so my bridesmaid dress I have to wear in 3 weeks barely zippers up.
There were several redeeming qualities about the day, however:
A) I wore my new cute headband to dinner
B) I got a swirl margarita from Lauriol Plaza (yes it is a cliche restaurant with avergage mexican food that is overpriced, but it is a Dupont staple and HOT DAMN are those margaritas tasty. They even cheer you up after you murder a squirrel)
C) My family is adorbs and makes me happy even after murdering a squirrel, bending my fingernail halfway back, getting fatter, and getting shat on by a bird: